Why vs. What: Talking to Kids about Pornography

By Hysen Sisco

Brannon Patrick, LCSW at Addo Recovery

When parents talk to children about pornography they often make the mistake of focusing on the what instead of the why. Parents might say to their children, “Pornography is bad,” or “Be careful about what you see on your phone,” while failing to teach and discuss why pornography should be avoided.

Parents might try to get their children to open up about pornography exposure by asking, “What have you seen online?”

A much better question, however, would be, “Why is it important to talk with us if you see bad things online?” Asking why is critical in raising pornography resilient youth.

Just telling children what to do without explanation can hinder parenting efforts. If a child does something that goes against what they’ve been taught without fully understanding why they’ve been taught it, they will feel shame and confusion. The what questions and statements alone tend to lead to dishonesty and shame.

If children are taught that pornography is “bad” and told, “Don’t look at it,” when they see pornography they are intrigued and energized by it. They might think, “Mom and Dad say pornography is bad, but I actually really like it. Does that mean that I’m …read more

Read the full article here: http://pornharms.com/why-vs-what-talking-to-kids-about-pornography/

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